Joker.....

It's a strange ritual....

The art of beautification....
Using a mask of colours to try and hide what is really there....
I've stopped using make-up....
Ok...
Not 100% stopped....
I wear eye-liner and mascara....
That's it....
nothing more...
sometimes WAY less....
I have not been styling my hair....
The only ritual I've kept is smelling good....
And keeping my skin soft....
Should someone decide to caress it.....
I work in a man's world...
the princess look just doesn't work....
But today....
I took that extra step....
I added powder....
A little shine to my eye lid's...
And Heaven forbid....
Hairspray.....
I took my time selecting my mascara....
(yes I have more than one.....)
I tried to cover the tired bags under my eyes....
And I enhanced my lips with liner and gloss....
Today is a girls day...
And I'm going to look like a girl....
Smell like a girl....
feel like a girl....
I have selected feminine lingerie...
a comfortable... yet cute outfit....
I'm lotion-ed...
And silky....
I feel 110% wonderful....
Yet...
Why is it...
When I look at myself in the mirror I feel like I'm looking at a clown???
What I once considered beautiful feels so foreign....
I mean I only used Heaths photo as a mild suggestion of application....
Either way...
The damage is done....